On the Sunny Side of the Street

Yellow. Citrine. Mustard. Lemon. Fluorescent. I am craving any shade of yellow right now. I’m on the hunt for sunshine and brightness and light. It’s not an easy color to find let me tell you…and yet I know have a closet punctuated with brightness! Color that signals growth and change. It is small and it makes me happy.

One year and one month since Covid set in, there seems to be a light at the end of the tunnel. Vaccinations are on a roll, families are starting to hug and vacations are being put on the calendar. Maybe my need for yellow right now is the quest for a new beginning, not going back to what was; more like evolving into a better reality. One with more space and time to appreciate life, to appreciate being home sleeping in my own bed, having time for exercise and yoga and connecting meaningfully with my friends and family. This last year has been a huge pause, a disruption to our normal reality. We had to adapt to help everyone globally, think biggest than us. My wish is that we all remember we are in this life together no matter where we are, no matter who we are and to really appreciate what truly matters in this world. Being with our family, taking time out for restoration, helping others in need, doing something in service of keeping others safe. My list could go on and on about what this year has given us to reflect on, even the sad things, even the horrific things that have made us all wake up to the injustices. I believe it was time for all of us to wake up and perhaps have light shone on things we weren’t paying attention to.

What is drawing your attention right now? Me? It’s my daily dose of yellow, my daily dose of sunshine and hopes for better days to come.

All artwork courtesy of Helena Light Hadley - nlightn

Yoo-hoo Where’ve you been?

Yoo-hoo where have you been? To say that I’ve been lost in Covid time is an understatement. Days are strange. Time is spread out in to days that are fast, days that are slow and the days that seem to have just disappeared. I’ve been taking this time to rejuvenate, to regenerate, to review and to reflect on my life. Who knew that I would be someone who could run every day for 131 days in a row? I think I’ve surprised even myself. I’m doing yoga with my family three times a week. My brother-in-law, my sister, my nephew and my niece, what a complete and utter joy. I’ve been given this gift, this window into my family that I could’ve never dreamed of. When my grandsons were visiting, even my 10-year-old grandson Logan did yoga with us. And to have that sweet child next to me bending and stretching and working on his breathing is something I will never forget.

Today in yoga, Emeka our instructor, used words that I haven’t thought of in a while – –Excellent! Superb! Wow! Wow! Wow! He reminds us that something good is happening, that life has Immeasurable worth. His outlook on life is a wonderful reminder of all the things that I am grateful for right now during this crazy Covid time . So while I’m not sure I would’ve ever wished for 131 days and counting of this bizarre period in life, I’ll take it, what about you?

Simple Pleasures

Covid has given me an opportunity to slow down and reflect. As I’m writing this (voice to text!) I’m actually ironing pillowcases. Just the act of ironing out the wrinkles, making something I’m gonna lay my head on at night, smooth and soft, gives me a sense of accomplishment.

I think this time out for the world is giving us the much-needed space to reflect on our lives. To reflect on how we’ve been living …what we’ve been doing with our time, and most importantly how are we treating other human beings. Life matters. Life is precious. All humans deserve to be treated with respect. As I’m ironing my pillowcases tonight, I am so grateful for the life I am living, I am grateful that I can be part of change, and I am grateful that our country and the world is waking up.

So what I invite you to share is what you have you been reflecting on… What silent meditations have you had? What are you going to do to bring positivity and change out of this time?

Wake up! Rise up!

Time Out

This is a weird, scary, unknown, strange time —-crazy—a pandemic. COVID-19. The Coronavirus. Who knew in the blink of an eye the world be socially distancing (who came up with that name?), that we would be self-quarantining, that weird people would be hoarding toilet paper and hand sanitizer. Every day more news, more cases, this is surreal for all of us.

For me my work is personal, it is about bringing people together and now I’m on hold, people are on hold, teams are on hold. While virtual meetings, zoom calls, FaceTime, are great ways to stay connected, we are all on hold until we can be together and this thing lifts. So what does one do with the change in time and space? So far —one month in, here’s how I’m coping:

1. My view is this is a time out of time and that this too shall pass—-don’t know when, but it will. It’s an opportunity. A time for reflection. A time to do things that I’ve always wanted to do, but didn’t have the time.
2. I’ve got a routine. I’m keeping my rituals and I’ve been adding new ones. I’m keeping some semblance of order and normalcy in my life.
3. I’m getting rest, staying in bed to say my prayers, to write, to be grateful for all that I have. To meditate.
4. Working out, exercise. I’ve created my own Covid running challenge, I’ve lost track, but I think I’m on day 34 of running every day. My poor dog Max is so exhausted at night he crashes and I do too.
5. Spring cleaning and organizing. Yesterday, and don’t judge, as I was changing sheets I finally sewed missing buttons on my duvet covers! So satisfying! I pulled out Q-tips and cleaned the corners of windowsills. I washed out the vacuum cleaner. Yes you heard me right—-cleaned the vacuum, I went crazy! Martha Stuart watch out!
6. Regular phone calls with my sister and brother to make sure we make each other laugh, to make sure we’re OK , just to hear each other‘s voices. We’ve been trying to bring some levity to this bizarre dream.
7. Everybody else is probably doing this one because it’s so decadent....Binge watching! Another , OK another random term that just didn’t exist until Netflix.
8. Growth. I’m taking a weekly meditation class, a professional certification, reading books that I’ve had on my shelf, Looking at this time to get better, to be better, to grow.

How about you? What are you up to today? What new rituals or routines have you put in place? How have you chosen to spend this time out of time?

Rinse and Repeat…

Rinse and Repeat…

The simple directions for washing your hair. Routine becomes muscle memory. Who even reads the directions anymore? How many things in our lives do we do on auto pilot? Alarm rings, get up, shower, coffee, go to work, come home, eat, binge watch (when exactly did that become a VERB)??? go to bed, get up and do it all over again.

Now life interrupted with a pandemic. It’s as if the record skipped and has started on a new song (you know retro vinyl) every day a new reality. What is the new rinse and repeat? How do we cope? It is evolving. It is changing with the wind…. Literally. I lie in bed and wonder what this new day will bring. Who will be touched? What is my task for the day?

My friend said she read on Next Door this week that there aren’t days of the week anymore, just today, yesterday and tomorrow. So simple, so finite, so easy to focus. I like it. So today I’ve got to make masks. Yep, fun ones, of course! I have lots of GO Lisey fabric, so I’m gonna whip some up! What about you?

Power Wash

Sometimes you need a good power wash! Crank it up, aim it and let the water flow! It is rewarding. Cleansing. Empowering. I spent most of my weekend with the power wash wand in my hand, cutting through dirt, algae, grime. I loved it! Spring cleaning at it’s best. Seeing the fruits of my efforts instantaneously. Wash away the winter months, begin the season of growth and sunshine and top-down convertible days.

Spring cleaning….What a great metaphor for life too. I know Marie Kondo is all about cleaning out, I’ll admit I haven’t read the book or watched her show, though I’ve talked to many people who have. Not sure how I feel about giving up my monogrammed high school sweaters, or my homecoming dresses, or my first Lacoste shirt (perfectly faded green by the way). What I do like about her advice, is asking the question, “does it give you joy?” What a great question. A great question for more than things, what about relationships, people, activities?

Recently I had an ending to a twelve year friendship and business partnership. While the circumstances weren’t great that led us there, in the end, did that relationship give me joy any more? Not really. Sometimes it’s hard to admit that a friendship has run its course, time to call it a day. It lasted for a certain season in my life and now it is time to move along. I’m working on the letting go, only if it were as easy as power washing, that would be divine. Though I think my weekend helped give me perspective, something can change, be transformed, released and there can be joy in that. So there’s my reframe today.

What would you like to clean up? Release? Spring is the perfect time to let go!

Magic Eight Ball

Do you remember those crazy magic eight balls? Shake it and get your fortune. Yes, no, can’t predict right now? What did that ball have in store for you? That’s how I actually felt about a recent Doctor’s visit. Something unusual happening, and so she wanted to do a uterine sonogram. Really? The last time I had to have one was due to side affects from Tamoxifen. A cancer scare. Now what?

So I waited for my appointment, went in and then waited patiently, or maybe not so patiently, for the Doctor to review the results. Let’s see…shake that magic eight ball….what will the news be? Sorry, you may have uterine cancer, maybe more tests—-still sorry——or you’ve escaped this one and you’re fine. Exhale, it was good news. My lucky day.

Life after cancer is like this. You get diagnosed, you go through treatment, you survive and yet there are always reminders. So what can you do? Live your life, There will be more moments where the crazy eight ball will shake, no sense worrying about those in this moment.

Babushkas and Big Hair

Have you ever laughed so hard that you cry? That’s exactly what I’m doing sitting at the beach with my best friends.  It’s Labor Day and we are reading magazines, feet in the sand and laughing our head’s off.   Fall fashion seemed to be seeded with lots of silver, western-wear, plaid, and crazy big hair and no kidding babushkas!  Just saying this word has set us off in peals of full on laughter.  My stomach hurts, that’s how hard I’m laughing.  I’m sure the people around us think we are just a little bit nuts, and we don’t care. 

Life can be serious, hard, scary and stressful.  So find the levity in things, have a good yuk, lighten the mood and laugh until it hurts.   It’s good for the soul.  And for goodness sakes wrap that big hair up in a babushka! !!!

What makes you laugh? 

Fairy Tale

  OK, why did I get up on a Saturday morning to watch a royal wedding? What was it about saying Prince Harry get married? What was the allure? Why were people all over the world sucked into this extravaganza? It is not reality for most of the world. Who spends over $30 million on a one hour wedding? That is the more than most of the world would ever, ever ,ever make in a lifetime. It’s ridiculous, gluttonous, extreme. And yet....I got up and watched it.  

Harry, while a Royal, was just a boy when his mom died. His grief and life were on full display. His acting out, his misbehaving, was for all to see. Just a boy who grew up and found his way and a wife.

Meghan, just a girl. She comes from a divorced home. Grew up in America.  She had drive and she wanted to act. She was tenacious and she succeeded. A biracial, American, divorcee marries a Prince of England. That’s a story, an incredible story. So I watched. The sweet exchanges of their faces, the words shared between them that no one else could hear. Listened to the choices of music, passages and personalization of the spectacle the wedding was. It’s seem to me it was like them. Do I care about Harry and Meghan? I couldn’t really say, I don’t know them! And yet I’m happy for their fairytale. For the hope they represent, the dreaming. The idea something extraordinary can happen.   And the truth is in life we never know when something miraculous can happen. Even after tragedy and sadness, incredible jewels can emerge.

We can hope and look for those moments. And, so I watched, tuned out the gross display of wealth and other absurdities and just relished for a moment the joy they shared.  

Hope. Dreaming. Looking for the magic. Period.   Where do you look for the magic? Hope? Dreams?

All You Need Is Love

I just got home from California.  My brother Jim and I were there visiting my sister Becky.  She's had a second stroke. Strokes beget strokes that's the neurologist said.  My heart hurts so much for my sister for the loss of her prior life, use of her left had, her brain and decision making function. So much loss.  The first stroke was terrible, this stroke has made an even worse impact.  After many conversations with nurses, the rehab director, social worker, neuro-psychologist, hope felt like it was slipping away each day.

Living without hope feels horrible.  Jim and I did our best reframe the current state for Becky.  She doesn't seem to be in pain anymore.  She is no longer grieving her husband Jack, my Mom, my Dad.  She believes her husband is outside puttering around on projects, or out driving around in his old 280Z.  My Mom is visiting her and painting cards for her.  All the anger she had after her first stroke has dissipated. 

The brain is such a complex ruler.  Her days are simple.  She likes being encouraged, she loves hugs, to be touched, to touch you.  She moves to music.  The Beatles, Rolling Stones, Enya, Daft Punk, Carole King.  She sings all the words, moves her right hand and dances.  It seems as the more complex, heavy, hard things become, if you just boil it down to the basics, all you really do need is love.  Show up, be present, hold a hand, give a hug, sing and dance, just BE together.

What else is there?